How can things work out when my partner blames me for getting pregnant?


One person of a couple blaming the other for a pregnancy indicates that:

  • both people need to be reminded that no form of birth control is 100% effective, so that…
  • anytime a fertile man and woman have intercourse, there is a possibility of a pregnancy.
  • If both you and he are fertile, getting pregnant means that both of your reproductive systems worked exactly as they were designed to work.

But biology isn’t the real issue here, is it?

  • A blaming response to the news that you’re pregnant is not a loving one.
  • It is not supportive or caring.
  • It is not endearing or welcoming.
  • It is a response that will need his regret and your forgiveness.

Does a blaming response say something about the relationship?  Yes, it does.  But don’t forget – people grow in relationships.  People mature by facing challenges and working through them.

  • Was his blaming caused by panic about finances?
  • Bad timing?
  • Housing concerns?
  • Job insecurity?

If those reasons played a factor in his blaming, he may have a change of heart in time, once he calms down and realizes that a baby can, indeed, be welcomed into your lives.